Walking in the Light

I’ve decided to become a better man.

Stop. Before you scroll down to the comment section to give me a pep talk, wait and hear me out. I’m not feeling bad about myself, or deficient, or whatever. I believe that I am good man. But I want to be a better one.

So I’ve enlisted the help of one of my favorite websites/blogs – theartofmanliness.com, which published its impressive course “30 Days to a Better Man” some time ago. It’s really an interesting and diverse program, touching of all sorts of subjects, from “write a letter to your father” to “memorize a significant poem”. I saw it, bought the e-book, but haven’t begun until today.

Don’t misunderstand. This blog is not going to become a diary for my progress through the 30-day program, because some of that stuff isn’t really appropriate for publication. But I did just want to talk about the first task, Day 1, which I’ve been thinking about and ruminating on.

The assignment for Day 1 is to draw up a list of core values. Not a definitive list – in fact, you’re restricted to five. This was difficult, actually. For one thing, it was difficult to pin down specific values that were important to me. Then, it became difficult to siphon through the values that I actually have and the value I just wish I had. I guess the list I put together is somewhere between the two.

I’m not expecting anyone to be interested in this, by the way. It’s just given me a lot to think about, and besides, I wanted this list to be somewhere I can find it in case I lose the physical copy.

These are my core values – the values that are most important to me as a man right now. These are not necessarily my strongest qualities. In fact, these aren’t even all qualities that I can honestly say I possess. But they *are* the values that are most important to me, that I admire, and that I most want to develop. My hope is that this list will steer my actions and my decisions to work toward the goal of developing and perfecting these values.

Devotion – I value complete devotion above everything else. By this I refer to devotion to my God and devotion to my loved ones. I want every decision, every action, every movement to be in the interest of serving my God, my family, and my friends, and strengthening my relationship with them. I want my constant prayer to be in all things “Serviam” – I will serve.

Integrity – This value encompasses many others. Honesty, loyalty, trust-worthiness. I want to strive always to be a man of true integrity. Such a man does not lie, or cheat. He’s a man one can trust always to stay true to his word and stand a pillar of dependability in a castle made of sand.

Courage – The strength to make the difficult decisions. This value applies in all situations, whether the decision be a professional risk, or a personal risk, or a physical risk. I want the courage to climb to the top of a tall tree and the courage to stand up for myself the ones I love, and make the decisions that will be most fruitful and rewarding regardless of how terrifying they may be.

Discipline – This is a value that is very important to me but that I *really* need to work on developing. It applies to every aspect of life – eating, exercising, studying, working, praying, learning, sleeping, playing. Discipline in these areas separates the men from the boys, and I really long to develop this aspect of my masculinity.

Independence – One of my most treasured values, and one that I hope to continue always to develop is my sense of independence. My life is mine alone, and it is mine to live however I see fit, without submission to any buy my God. I will not be captures or enslaved by any entity – work, family, friends, responsibility. Instead, I will balance these important aspects of my life on my own terms. I will control my own happiness and my own future. I will be dependent on no one and nothing. Each day I will rise up and take command of my own life, my own future, and my own destiny. I will work under the direction of my King and within the parameters of my core values to progress in my journey and my lifelong search for happiness, fulfillment, and masculinity.